November 1st, The Day of The Dead

I have never observed this day before. But from what I understand, it is a day that families come together to celebrate the lives of their loved ones that have passed. Particularly those who have passed in the past year. A skeleton is a common symbol used in the celebrations. Sometimes families will hold picnics in the graveyards where their loved ones rest. Alters are made and favorite foods of the deceased are brought to the alters or shared at the gatherings. The thought is that if you entice the spirits of your deceased loved ones to join you and you "dance with the dead".

I had a tough time (as I am sure many of us had) grasping the Newtown, CT Sandy Hook Elementary School massacre. Shortly after, People magazine came out with a wonderful edition that had all 27 victims pictured on the front.  I first saw this at the grocery store and burst in to tears right there in the check out line. Having 2 children in elementary school, a school that is much like Sandy Hook by description, I couldn't help to compare, and to picture this kind of thing happening to their school and to my children - it could have happened anywhere. I shielded my children from news casts at home and talked about it with them without the gory details. But when I would go to work, I had no control over the TV my patients were watching. Every time a report came on, the tears flowed and I would have to excuse myself from my patient's room. The news and information was coming faster than I could process. Luckily, I was able to fall right in to my therapist's office in January of this year. My goal was to work through this grieving process with something positive coming out of it.  The first step was to learn about these innocent victims pictured on the front of the People magazine - their faces, smiles, and eyes had burned into my soul. I needed to know who they were for they could have been my neighbor, my friend, my child's teacher, my child's principal, my child. I read their profiles and cried. I learned what their favorite color was, their personality, the sports team they were fans of, hobbies, passions,... and what they wanted to do in their life. I made a card for each one with their picture and profile. I was able to put these "in a box". The tears lessened. But I did not want to "forget".  I made a plan for myself that I would celebrate their lives on the Day of the Dead and figure out actions I could "Do" to honor them. October I started this blog - first blog ever. As I revisited each beautiful person whose lives were cut short, I learned how their families have been processing their unimaginable grief. The community has come together in big ways. I was awed by the missions and initiatives that have come from this event and how personal they are. So many have been able to take the passion of a 6 year old and make their dreams reality. These young souls had probably no real concept of "evil" and had probably never experienced real "evil" until moments before they passed. Many of the families have held on to that innocence and have made it blossom. When so many good people come together to do such really solid, creative, positive, loving, things... it is going to seriously put up a dang good battle against "evil". I want to be a part of THAT.

My children are off of school today. So we are going to spend the entire day celebrating the lives of these innocent victims.

Taking in to account the weather in my area, here is my schedule. If you are in my area, I invite you to drop by anytime. Or you can celebrate with us "virtually." ;)

0730 - a cup of tea with my husband - to honor Krystle Campbell (Boston bombing victim)
0800 - sneak out to store to buy things I need for today including a Starbuck's coffee in memory of Lauren Rousseau (full time substitute teacher)
0900 - blueberry pancakes with my kids - in memory of Lu Lingzi (Boston bombing victim)
0930 - throughout the day, I will discuss with my family the fact that the Dolphins won in overtime 22-20 over the Bengals last night - in memory of Mrs. Mary Sherlach (school psychologist) and the fact that the Red Sox won the World Series - in memory of Nancy Lanza (mom)
1000 - NY Giants logo on back of my hand - in honor of Jack Pinto (age 6)
Take family for a walk outdoors even if it is raining - in honor of Mrs. Anne Murphy (special resources teacher)
1100 - plant chrysanthemums and bulbs in memory of Allison Wyatt (age 6) and Madeline Hsu (age 6)
1130 - take shower and get dressed- Wear purple ravens shirt for Josephine Gay (age 7). Green ribbon - for Jesse Lewis (age 6). Pink ribbon in hair for Grace McDonnell (age 7).
1200 - set up my daughter art and craft area in basement - to also honor Emilie Parker (age 6)
1300 - Lunch of Tacos in memory of Noah Pozner (age 6)
1400 - Monopoly game in celebration of Martin Richard (age 8 - Boston bombing victim)
Afternoon - Music with singing and dancing in celebration of  Ana Grace Marquez-Greene (age6)
Beatles in memory of Benjamin Wheeler (age 6)
Home by Phillip Phillips in celebration of Charlotte Bacon (age 6)
1700 - sign my daughter up for extra curricular of her choice to honor Caroline Previdi (age 6)
sign up to volunteer at same extra curricular in memory of Dawn Hochsprung (Principal)
Print out WWDD bracelets to take orders for Daniel Barden (age 7)
1800 - bike ride in honor of Chase Kowalski (age 7)
Chalk on sidewalk of a butterfly for Dylan Hockley (age 6) and a big peace sign
Make plans to set up dog run in honor of Catherine Hubbard (age 6)
1900 - Make fire which will be named "Avie" for Avielle Richman (age 6)
At fire will be cowboy boots in memory of Jessica Rekos (age 6) and our purple flamingo in honor of Victoria Soto (teacher)
1930 - grill hamburgers over the fire for James Mattioli (age 6)
Say grace in honor of Olivia Engel (age 6)
Write letter to special resources teacher in celebration of Rachel D'Avino (behavioral therapist)


When December 14, 2013 rolls around, and the one year anniversary of Sandy Hook is brought back up in the media.... maybe I won't feel so helpless.